The topic of whether collaborative divorce would be right for your situation was discussed in a previous blog. If you and your future former spouse are considering using this alternative method of settling your divorce issues, understanding the process could help you make your final decision.

How it works

You and your spouse will need your own representation. You may want to find an attorney familiar with this process since he or she will need to agree that if the process fails, his or her representation of you ends. If you end up in court, you will need to hire a new attorney to represent you during the process. This works as an incentive for all of you to focus on making it work.

Before entering into negotiations, you will meet with your attorney separately. This is your time to determine what you want out of the process. It may help to identify those issues on which you don’t feel you can compromise and those you can. You may also take this time to determine what you will need in order to give yourself a good start to your post-divorce life. If you have children, you may want to go into negotiations with at least some idea of what you expect as far as a parenting plan.

You and your soon-to-be former spouse may seek the counsel of third parties, such as counselors, financial advisors and appraisers, as necessary in order to help you make the best decisions possible. A child counselor may help you determine the best course of action. You may use every tool at your disposal to help you come to an agreement with which you can both live.

How it ends

Once you come to an agreement, the court will need to approve it. Ensuring that it meets with the requirements the court looks for, protecting your rights and advising you regarding viable legal options for your issues are the steps for which a legal advocate may prove most valuable.


In a world that has evolved in many ways, there are still some quick to pass judgment on those whose relationships end in a dissolution. Unfortunately, many marriages will end in divorce regardless of how much effort the partners may invest. Kentucky residents who are contemplating this step have enough to handle without dealing with negative input from others.

When news of a divorce gets out, there may be some who will feel compelled to offer advice or express their opinions on how or why a marriage did not survive. While many may express support and offer encouragement, there are others who will seek to place blame and attempt to make the parties involved feel guilt. However, those who have gone through the process are likely relieved to have escaped from an untenable situation.

Two authors wrote a book to address the problem created by those who offer opinions to those who have chosen to seek a divorce. The book was written as a way to diffuse the negative emotions that are often experienced by those who have gone through a dissolution. It refers to differing certain schools of thought as a type of cow in order to point out the ridiculousness of seeking to blame those who do not remain in an unhealthy relationship.

Fortunately, there are professional counselors who can offer the support and tools that may prove to be useful for those who are going through the divorce process. The end of a relationship is difficult enough without enduring the critical judgments that some may offer. Kentucky residents who are unsure of how to proceed with a dissolution may seek the guidance of an experienced family law attorney in order to obtain the best settlement possible to support their fresh start in life.


According to the old saying, “All is fair in love and war,’ though most draw a line at deception. There are times when one may believe that any actions are justified during a high asset divorce. Kentucky residents who are preparing for a possibly contentious dissolution of their marriages may seek the guidance of experienced professionals.

A divorce between renowned Wall Street investor Bill Gross and his then-wife purportedly involved an artful deception on the part of the former Mrs. Gross. The couple owned an extensive collection of fine art that was supposedly appraised by a representative from the Sotheby’s auction house. Unbeknown to Mr. Gross, his former spouse had removed a painting by Picasso and replaced it with a replica she had painted herself.

By her account, she was given permission via email to remove from the couple’s home any of the art or belongings that she desired. However, she apparently did not inform him that she had taken the painting known as “Le Repos,” which is expected to be sold for an estimated $35 million. Several months later, the couple decided who would be granted ownership of the piece over a coin flip. The wife won the toss but did not mention that the painting in their home was a forgery.

Gross was informed of the deception, and it was brought up during the divorce trial. At that time, the wife also admitted to taking another piece of art without his knowledge. He had previously admired her ability to replicate famous paintings which they displayed in their home. It is unknown whether the wife was penalized by the court for her actions.

A high asset divorce may often involve intense disputes over jointly owned assets. At these times, it may be difficult to arrive at an amicable and equitable settlement agreement. Kentucky residents who are struggling to resolve these heated disputes may be best served by consulting with a knowledgeable family law attorney.

Source:, “Wife got prized Picasso painting in divorce, hangs fake version anyway“, Carleton English View, May 11, 2018


A spouse’s chosen career often can impact how the marriage plays out. Families in Kentucky with one or both spouses in the military have particular challenges due to frequent moves and long periods apart. While military divorce is not uncommon, many people attempt to save their marriages by seeking support and guidance from those who have lived as a military spouse for longer periods of time.

One woman married to a retired navy SEAL has chosen to write a book about her experience. She notes the high military divorce rate, explaining that deployments and the military lifestyle can be difficult on a family. The author’s husband was in the military for 22 years.

Like many military spouses, the author gave up her own career to raise her children while her husband was gone. He would leave for training and deployment for months at a time. The author admits it was a lonely experience and that she often felt resentment. Her husband admits that he did take her for granted during his career but is now extremely grateful for the family she raised and household she kept up while he was gone.

Kentucky military spouses may find it helpful to connect with others who have shared experiences. While it may be ideal to work through issues and not go through a military divorce, these marital breakdowns can occur with the stress of deployments and military life. Those facing such breakups have unique considerations regarding child custody, property division and many other issues. A lawyer is a good person to speak to about these various issues under Kentucky family law.

Source:, “Wife of retired Navy SEAL writes book to help spouses cope with military life“, Margaret Kavanagh, May 2, 2018


Many years ago, it was presumed that mothers were best suited to be the primary caregivers in the event of a divorce. Over the past several years, there has been a shift toward permitting both parents shared parenting arrangements. Just recently, Kentucky became the first state to pass a law that requires judges to order joint child custody in the majority of cases.

The new law now stipulates that family courts default to a joint custody arrangement. This change was seen as a way to provide more children with the opportunity to spend equal time with both parents, thereby preserving the bonds that they have formed. The law’s supporters believe that the majority of children thrive best in a more stable home life that includes both parents playing an active role in their lives.

The law will allow each parent the opportunity to play a significant role in the upbringing of his or her children. Though many Kentucky parents are able to arrive at a child custody agreement outside of the courts, the new law provides a framework from which a judge can work. Opponents of the law assert that it removes a judge’s ability to individually assess each family’s situation and decide what arrangement will best serve each child’s interest given his or her unique circumstances and needs.

There is a provision written in the law that states that parents who had a domestic violence restraining order issued against them in the past 36 months will not be awarded joint child custody. However, some believe that could still place a child in jeopardy if a parent has committed any violent or abusive acts against someone other than a family member. Residents who are unable to devise their own parenting plan may seek the advice of a family law attorney.

Source:, “New Law Requires Judges To Default To Joint Custody In Divorce“, Ryland Barton, April 29, 2018